Narrator: Joe Hempel
Series: The Half-Assed Wizard #1
on 11 September 2017
Length: 4 hrs and 29 mins
Genres: Contemporary Fiction, Fantasy, Humor, Urban Fantasy
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A couple of jerks wake me up at the crack of noon. Seems my klepto uncle stole an ancient deck of Tarot cards from a high-powered wizard, and too many losers want to ruin my day to get them back.
The cards are cool, so I check them out, but my magic-happy cousin, Sabrina, tells me I'm not supposed to touch them. Oops. Too late. Now the damn cards are tuned to me, and if someone else wants to use them, I have to die. Why couldn't she have led with that information?
Magic was never my scene, but my dad is one of the most powerful wizards in the world, so I've got unrealized potential if I ever bother to apply myself. I'd rather power nap, but with wizards, gunslingers, and cannibalistic shark dudes coming at me, that's not gonna happen.
They say I'm a half-assed wizard, but if I don't play my cards right, I'm gonna get my whole ass killed.
©2017 Gary Jonas (P)2017 Gary Jonas
This was a fast-paced, fun, and snarky wizarding tale. Brett Masters is way more interested in sleeping, attempting to make music with his band, and drinking than he is in family wizarding politics. He comes from a rich and powerful family and has never had to work for his keep. Things are about to be upended!
I could totally picture Brett. I’ve known a few people like him stuck in that place of not contributing to anything so it was easy to get a feel for this main character right away. The entire story, I was rooting for him, hoping he’d get his feet under him and finally save the day.
His cousin, Sabrina, showed a polar opposite to Brett. She hails from the same rich and powerful family, is an accomplished wizard herself, and is a motivational power, constantly pushing Brett to do something… anything, really. While she’s not our only female character, she is the main one. More than once she has to be rescued but she also spends a third of the time kicking butt.
The shark men! Ack! These guys were a bit creepy. No one wants to tango with shark men… unless you’re a half-assed wizard that is pretty drunk and out of good options (like running away and hiding for half a century).
There’s also Brett’s band. Michael was the one that stood out the most to me. He has dreamy vampire eyes that can melt the panties off of almost anyone. Unfortunately, his charm doesn’t work on powerful wizards like Brett’s dad or his main adversary. Michael does give Brett some much needed advice about living in the real world, but I think Brett was too drunk to take much of it in.
There’s plenty of rock and roll references. I only caught some of them. I’m sure others will recognize songs, musicians, and the like. The enchanted guitar pick was a fun little tidbit.
Overall, this tale is enjoyable. There’s not much character depth and the plot is pretty straight forward but the characters make it excellent brain candy. I look forward to the sequel! 4/5 stars.
I received a free copy of this book.
The Narration: Joe Hempel makes an excellent slacker Brett Masters. He has this perfect don’t give a flip attitude for this character. I also really liked his drunk Brett voice. His female voices were sometimes feminine and sometimes needed a little boost to sound like a woman. All his character voices were distinct. 4.5/5 stars.
This review first appeared on DabOfDarkness.com